I love Facebook. I love how it connects people together from the various "phases" of your life all in one big convienient, albeit "virtual" place. I have now got to the point where I rarely check email and do nearly 100% of my personal communications there. This being said, I've been wanting for some time now come up with a list of what I think are the most annoying things I see on Facebook. I'm sure you have your own list. Most of you who know me well realize that although I can be sarcastic and cynical in my approach sometimes, know that most of my snarkiness is intended to be "tongue-in-cheek," so this should be taken this way as well. All of these are done in love, and if you do any of these, you needn't fear facing instant "defriendilization" from me (just made that up). As, I'll freely admit, I've been guilty of some of these "sins" too as I've journeyed through the evolution of Facebook over the past few years. So, have a light-hearted gander at some of the things that get under my skin in Facebook-land. These are not in any order.
1. The Holy Rollers Every single status update doesn't have to be a scripture passage or inspirational quote. If something really touches me from God's Word or my devotion for the day, I'm going to share it, and I want to hear what's inspirational to my friends as well. However, I won't think you any less of a Christian if you post that all you're doing is folding laundry. Even as a minister, I don't have any false notions that when people are not at church that they are at home reading the KJV Bible all day long.
2. Virtual Hugs, Kisses, Pokes, Superpokes, Trinkets, et. al. When it comes to hugs, virtual ones don't even touch real ones, so don't even try. A one sentence hand-typed out wall post by you will ALWAYS means 1,000,000 times more than a "hug" you've forwarded to your 300 other friends at the same time.
3. Farmville, Mafia Wars, and the like. I will admit I've tried a few of the "farm games" but couldn't get into them at all. But, please, I beg you, do you actually know how ridiculous it sounds to forward me a request for me to buy you a cow for your farm, or to aid you in a Mafia hit? Now, I do play my fair share of the FB app games. Some are incredibly fun and addicitve. The competition among friends can be really great. However, like with the aforementioned hugs, when you forward requests from them to your entire friends list, it really clogs up the information flow and keeps people from hearing that request from another friend for prayer for their mom in the hospital, or that lone cry for help. Play the games to your hearts content, but save all of the invites just for the few people you know that have a real interest in it. A good rule of thumb probably is if you haven't had any communication with someone (whether it be chat, wall post, email, phone call, text message, book club, seen in church or Sunday School) in the last six months, asking them for a cow seems a bit shallow, don't you think? How about instead asking them how their family is, have a real conversation, then you may determine if a cow request is in order. I won't comment on requests to commit a virtual mob killing.
4. Status Message Causes. This is a relatively new trend. They often begin with something like. "I love our soldiers. Their sacrifices daily ensure our freedom. " and end with a guilt-ridden statement saying something like "93 % of you will not forward this on. If you love your soliders, copy this as your status message." Ugh. You know what. I love our soliders. I love my country. I love my wife and family. I love Jesus. But, it doesn't mean that I love them any less if I don't change my status message to a forced statement that says I do. And you know what, 93% of you won't even read this anyway to know that this is a pet peeve of mine. :)
5. Don't constantly solicit or try to sell me something. Now I need to be careful here. I do want to know about your business or organization if that's something that's important to you. I do want to hear about your church or ministry and even its financial needs. What I don't want is every post, every note, every status message reminding me that I should buy something from you or donate $$ to you. A concrete example: I chose to follow one of my favorite Christian comedians on Twitter. Every single post was a commercial asking me to buy their latest project. I mean, EVERY ONE. Sometimes there would be three or more a day. Now think about why I would follow a nationally known Christian Comedian on Twitter in the first place. Hmmmm, perhaps because I thought they would say something funny now and then? Instead, no laughs from me, but a click on the unfollow button. Think about WHY people are following you or friending you in the first place and it puts things in a new perspective.
6. Facebook "PDA". Just like in real life, no one likes to see people who are constantly too publicly affectionate. Virtually, this can be a problem too, although I'll admit that I've seen a decline in this over the past year, thankfully. Again, what I do want is to hear of new and good things happening within relationships, marriages, etc. What I don't want is every post telling me your undying love for someone. Now I may be totally off-base here, and I'll freely admit to being wrong, but sometimes when I see an individual or couple constantly proclaiming their online love for eachother, I kind of get, well, suspicious. If someone feels a need to go to extremes in saying one thing, who are they REALLY trying to convince? A heartfelt comment now and then trumps a lavish barrage of vomitously sickening verbage. (How's that for poetic? Plus I just had a stomach virus this week, so "vomit" was a natural word for me.) We also need to think about the feelings of those who don't have that special someone yet and how hearing this from you won't help them in the least. And related to this, I have to speak to older people (yes, I will reluctantly put myself in that category) using words like "smokin' hot," or "sexy" to describe your mate online. I think you have a free pass about once or twice a year to throw this out for dramatic effect (Valentine's day, Anniversary, etc.). But that's it. Anymore than that, it just brings out the creepy vibe. Less than thirty-somethings may have a little more grace here. And although my wife is both of those aforementioned adjectives in my eyes, do you really want me sharing that with you often?
7. Sharing Your Vices. Most likely if you cuss like a sailor in real life, it's likely that you're probably not a close friend of mine in real life much less on Facebook. Still, my facebook list, and probably yours too has a wide range of individuals with varying morals/faiths etc. in it. And that's okay. What I'd like to ask is that if you have a behavior, habit, or vice that is controversial, potentially offensive, or one that could be seen as "a stumbling block" to others, it's best to keep that to yourself, UNLESS it's something you're seeking help with. Please don't share about your drunken exploits, or any exploit that falls into one of the categories I've listed above. And to get on my minister soapbox (or pulpit as the case may be) just a bit, if you're going to skip church, don't brag about it on Facebook. Just not cool. Remember that the time you post something is just as visible as what you post. Nuff said. Stepping off soapbox now.
8. Negativity/Your Profile Tells a Story. FB is a place to share both good and bad things. It shouldn't be a rose-colored glasses type Shangri-la. I want to hear people's heavy hearts as well as their victories. However, if every update you post is about something bad in your life, it's a real downer to everyone. You can check yourself on this very easily. Look at all of the status updates you've posted from your profile page and just sit down and read the past few months worth one day. It is a very telling story about your outlook on life! Now I'll pick on myself here. Someone once told me they enjoyed reading my updates because I was always talking about where or what I was eating. That's silly, I thought. Well, when I went back and checked, they were right. It seemed at least one post a day told about my dining habits almost to the degree as if I was a restaurant reviewer. Our profiles definitely tell the story of what our priorites and problems are, and there's no wonder why I'm overweight!
As I've went back and reviewed what seems to have become an unintentionally long preface to a Facebook Sociology textbook, I think there's one theme that I think that ties everything together: When it comes to your facebook posts, don't camp out on anything too long. Whether that be negativity, affection, causes, campaigns, or escapism, THINK Moderation. One of Facebook's greatest features is that it's a slice of life. A slice of this life, and a slice of that life. Too much of a good thing can make you sick. Oh yeah, and spend some time with these people in real life now and then, would ya?
Well, that's all from me for now. I've got to go get ready for a date with my smokin' hot wife. ;)
Taking note of God's blessings,
Chris Bridges
1 comment:
LOL, love these and most of them are on my pet peeves too. I have started hiding all things related to farmville, mafia wars etc. etc.
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